How to Help Children Who See Spirits

I would like to see you write about how to help children who are having psychic experiences. My daughter sees spirits and she is very frightened by what she sees. She asks why she is seeing “scary” people instead of “nice” people and I am unsure how to help her.

I often get people asking me about dealing with kids who have psychic experiences.  In the past, I would shy away from responding since I don’t have kids and obviously because of this I don’t have a child who has had a psychic experience.

Then, after getting about the 50th request to write about this, I decided to write about it anyway. First of all I will talk about my childhood experience and then give some tips for dealing with children who can see or sense spirits, based on what I went through.

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Seeing a Spirit

When I was about 5 years old, I saw a spirit and it freaked me out big time. It was quite late at night, and I was sleeping in the study, as my bedroom was being redecorated. I was playing in my bed and when I looked up, I saw a woman standing in the corner of my bedroom. She was dressed in a style that was of the turn of the century and I still remember exactly what her silhouette looked like (I grew up in a house that was built around the end of the nineteenth century).

I remember my heart beating so fast I thought it would burst. I put the covers over my head and wished for her to go away. I was so frightened. I must have fallen asleep eventually.

I am fairly certain she was an earthbound spirit (a soul who has died but not crossed over) although at the time I didn’t know who she was. I just knew she wasn’t a real person.

I told my mum about it in the morning and I remember her really paying attention to me and seeming worried. My mum has a very scientific background so I’m not sure what was going through her mind at that point when I told her that I “saw something”.

I remember her telling me that I had seen the tooth fairy (I had a tooth under my pillow that night).

But being very sensitive, I picked up on my mum’s worry and concern and the situation seemed serious to me somehow, because of that. Plus I was confused as to why the tooth fairy was so scary and not like I had imagined her at all. If my mum was worried, I felt, then I should be scared too.

Perhaps my mother was worried that it was the beginnings of a mental illness, but I interpreted the worry as a sign that I had indeed seen something terrible, after all, even mum was scared.

(Incidentally, this is when my fear of spirits really took root, to the extent that it was the biggest hurdle for me to overcome when I started to do psychic development.  I shut down my clairvoyance big time and for a long time I didn’t want to become a professional intuitive because I was too scared, even though I knew it was my path.)

Anyway, having been on the receiving end of a fib about the tooth fairy, and the confusion it created, my advice would be to tell the truth and try not to convey any worries you are having about the situation. It will just make your child feel that there is ‘something wrong’ and she will feel the energy. After all, if your child is ‘seeing things’, the chances are he/she might be an empath too and if she is, she will definitely pick up on your anxiety.

What if you can’t explain it to your child because you don’t know anything about spirits? Here’s a quick run down of the facts, according to me:

The Reality of ‘Ghosts’

There are lost spirits walking this planet. I’ve been clearing them from auras and properties for a few years now. You could call them astral entities, earthbound spirits, ghosts, whatever. These spirits are lost because they don’t want to cross over to the other side for whatever reason – it could be a physical addiction (i.e. an alcoholic who can’t bear to be on a plane where there is no alcohol.)  It could be unfinished business for the earthbound spirit, that is keeping him/her on the earth plane, or a strong attachment to a loved one (i.e. the spirit is waiting for a loved one so they can cross over together – that is a more unusual scenario in my experience.) They cross over eventually. 

Sometimes these spirits are seen or sensed. People who are doing psychic development can sometimes get excited when they get in contact with a spirit, and begin to channel it, just because they can. That’s a very bad move, unless you want to channel a spirit of a very low vibration who will probably freak out on you. These lost spirits are very unstable.  We generally want to channel spirit guides and those spirits who are MEANT to assist us – not these lost spirits.

So, that’s the reality of the situation. I feel it is a good thing to be able to educate your child about spirits before other people or Hollywood does:

Hollywood’s Portrayal of Spirits

In movies, spirits are evil and scary.  They come to torment us or just to frighten us. They can do weird things, like throw objects around the room. They are creepy.

Unfortunately, the way spirits are portrayed in movies is downright disturbing and it bears so little resemblance to reality that it’s laughable. Just because people think spirits are fearsome and scary doesn’t mean they are. And when we see them, we might see them as scary, simply because we have been conditioned to see them that way.

Another reason why we might see lost spirits as scary is because they hang out in a very low vibration (stuckness and unhappiness.) Coming into contact with that vibration can feel unpleasant, but it does not mean that the lost spirit is fearsome.

So I would say, take the chance to educate your child on what she is seeing, before popular culture does and she becomes even more scared.

Here are some tips for what I would personally explain/do:

1. Don’t encourage your child to interact with or make a friend of spirits

Some people may disagree, but I feel that there is really no place for the lost spirit, in a child’s room or around your child. There is a place for guardian angels and spirit guides, but not for lost spirits. I have heard of some parents who encourage the child to talk to the lost spirit, as if it’s some long lost ancestor. I personally wouldn’t encourage that. We aren’t meant to be channelling random spirits (unlike spirit guides, they don’t have helpful or uplifting guidance for us).

2. Explain to your child what she is seeing

Yes, this probably involves explaining what happens when we die if you have not already (I personally think that heaven is a nice concept). You could explain that some souls do not want to go to heaven straight away and instead wait around for someone they loved – and occasionally they get lost and go where they shouldn’t. I personally wouldn’t make up a lie because your child will sense it, and will be confused, and confusion can breed fear.

3. Make spirits seem less scary

I remember when I was little I was very scared of spiders. For some reason, I became less scared of them when my dad explained that spiders are more scared of us than we are of them – they seemed less fearsome once I knew that.

When I clear these lost spirits from locations and auras, they do sometimes seem pretty terrified. So you could tell your child that usually spirits are as scared of us as we are of them. Plus we, as humans, have all the power. Lost spirits are pretty much powerless. They can’t do anything to hurt us. I also remember my father once saying to me ‘it’s not the dead who can hurt us’ (i.e. the dead are not to be feared.)

4. Don’t make it ‘weird’ or ‘worrying’

Try to make it as normal as possible, but you could also touch on the fact that it’s not OK to talk about it to just anyone, because some people can’t see the spirits and will think you’re making it up!

Hopefully these tips should make the experience of sensing or seeing a spirit less traumatic for your child. But if they don’t, here’s a final tip:

Remind your child that she in control

You can let your child know that it is possible to ask a spirit to leave their space. It is also possible to call on an angel to come and take the lost spirit away. If your child sees spirits in her bedroom at night, place a little angel symbol somewhere for her to hold if she gets scared. Teach her a simple prayer such as ‘Archangel Michael, come and take away this lost spirit’.  Remind her that she has angels who look after her and who can remove the lost spirits.

Hopefully this article is helpful for parents out there who have been through this with their child. If you have some experience in this area, feel free to present other ideas or suggestions in the comments section below. Or if your child has seen a spirit, feel free to talk about your experiences with this below.

 

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28 Responses to “How to Help Children Who See Spirits”

  1. Anna,

    This article is wonderful! I’ve really missed reading what you have to say while you’ve been busy putting your course together.

    As a little girl I saw spirits and I was terrified at times, too. I remember the first time I saw one – I was about 5 years old and saw a little ginger boy holding a bag of groceries. He was standing at the side of my bed in the middle of the night. I did exactly as you did…put my head under the covers and willed it to go away. I guess I eventually fell asleep.

    I don’t remember telling my mom, but I do remember seeing him several times after that moment. And I remember playing “school” with the spirits I felt in my bedroom as a kid. I was the teacher and they were my apt pupils! ;) Nothing bad ever came of that, but as an adult now I wouldn’t encourage that kind of playing with spirits if my own child ever has these sensitivities.

    I still don’t want to ‘see’ anything…I grew up sleeping with my head under the covers any time I saw or felt a spirit (I only played school in the daylight!) and even as an adult I’m pretty sure I’d feel scared shitless if I saw a spirit standing in my room or home. I know what to do if that should ever happen, but I still don’t want it to!

    Thanks again for this!

  2. Anna says:

    Oh Lindsay, what you said sounded exactly like my childhood! How funny.

    I too used to play teacher with imaginary students who had real personalities and appearances to me.

    I also used to sleep with my head under the covers, but most of the time.

    Seeing that little boy holding the groceries must have really startled you.

  3. Frances says:

    “(Incidentally, this is when my fear of spirits really took root, to the extent that it was the biggest hurdle for me to overcome when I started to do psychic development. I shut down my clairvoyance big time and for a long time I didn’t want to become a professional intuitive because I was too scared, even though I knew it was my path.)”

    Ditto. I saw spirits for many years as a child, and b/c my mom told me that was NOT a good thing, the experiences stopped. My mom didn’t look worried when I used to tell her I had these experiences; she looked more annoyed and had the “Why do I have to have the freak child?” look on her face! LOL However, when I told my dad and stepmom, they looked interested and asked me questions. I didn’t live full time with them so unfortunately the support wasn’t there all the time.

    And when spirits started “showing up” again in my mid-twenties, instead of me being extremely scared I kinda seeked them and started learning what these experiences were.

    As a child, I had very little opportunity (no real family support) so they left me alone. However, in my mid-twenties I used to ask myself, “Why now? Why again?”…well, b/c I could do something about it.

    They know better, don’t they? :P

  4. Frances says:

    Forgot to add that now my daughter, whose three years old, has started having psychic experiences. She’s seeing her “Pop Pop” who passed in 2007 (she was born in 2008) and tells me she talks to him at night.

    I’m excited! LOL Bottom line: she’ll have my 100% support :)

  5. Darla says:

    great article anna! i think you handled the subject well, even though you’re not a parent. I took to sleeping in a tight little ball on my stomach– and still do– for fear of seeing something. I don’t have a memory of it but I’m sure this pattern stems from an experience . . .

  6. Anna says:

    LOL. Frances, I think my mum was not too happy about having a freak child on her hands either (although she would disagree!)

    I think it’s much nicer when a child sees a deceased relative.

  7. Anna says:

    Thanks Darla! Oh interesting. Wonder if you’ll ever stop sleeping like that.

  8. Attila says:

    Hi Anna, I find your advice very useful.
    My approach to seeing negative astral entities or experiencing anything negative in my life is showing myself greater appreciation and love, as the outside world is but a mirror of the inner one. This is true not only to physical reality but to all manifest dimensions in existence. And since it’s a child in question who sees these spirits having limited free will, wisdom and life experiences, it’s the parents’ responsibility to pay enough loving attention to her and nurture a smooth, intelligent and empathetic way of communication between them and the child thus giving her adequate self esteem which would enable her to experience life in all of its dimensions more filled with love and light, on a much higher and blissful vibrational level. Noone should raise a child without first being able to provide this for themselves, yet we see ruined people all over the world for the very same reason. Then the child will have double the work to do; to deal with her childhood traumas related to her parents as well as learning to understand how other dimensions and the universe as a whole works. Probably it was all her choice at a higher level before birth anyway so there’s nothing to get agitated for me here anyway :)

  9. Julie A Clear Sign says:

    I have two children, and one of them is definitely tuned in to spirit and has been since birth. Now that he is 3 and verbal, when he brings it up I just engage him in conversation about it as if it’s completely normal, but I have also told him that he has angels on his team who watch out for him all of the time, so if he gets scared he should simply ask them for protection and to remove the “ghost.”

  10. Namaste says:

    While I don’t have kids, I was interested to hear your thoughts on this subject. I wasn’t comfortable around kids until a friend of mine told me to, “Just talk to her like an adult.” Now my friend’s daughter and I have great conversations and she’s 7 years old. Kids are way more aware than people give them credit for so telling them the truth, just makes sense. Knowledge really can be power at times, especially in cases like this…

  11. anonymous says:

    Hi Anna,

    Wonderful article. I am still in the process of looking back at my childhood and re-analyzing my experiences. It wasn’t until the last couple of years that I realized that I did see spirits, and was very afraid, but since I had only negative messages from my parents I shut down the intuitive part of myself for most of my life, until the last several years. (There are still a few experiences that I don’t yet have a frame of reference for!)

    It was interesting that recently, because of a series of events in my life, I started “re-learning” about spirits. It was almost like I had to reach a point of confidence in my life before I was ready to do so. (I had no problem with learning about intuitive stuff, but “ghosts” held so much fear for me.) I started learning about “astral entities” instead of “ghosts”, and even this change in terminology removed the negative emotional charge and fear on my part. Then I could take in the “new” information about spirits and who they are, and what they do, and how to deal with them.

    It is also interesting for me as the parent of young children, both of whom are sensitive. One of my kids is very afraid of one specific spirit (I’ve tried different techniques for dealing with this, but as this one keeps occurring I’m thinking I need some more outside help again). My other child constantly talks to a “sibling in spirit”. I’m learning as I go and winging it (like most parenting), but I’m trying to stay open, to honor their feelings and thoughts, teach them about their guides, and in the case of the lower vibration spirits, how to tell the spirit to go away.

    Anyways, I’d love more resources on this topic. Perhaps in time I will have figured out enough about it to share, but until then I appreciate posts like yours.

    Kara

  12. Susan says:

    I didn’t realize my son was seeing ghosts until a lovely local psychic came to our house and clued me in. Now, my boy will mention to me from time to time about this spirit or that. The psychic let me know that we have a woman from about 100 years ago, who is just wandering around the area and likes the energy of our house. At night I will specifically tell her to not check on my son while he’s sleeping- that he’s just fine. Recently, my son has been telling me about a black man he sees. I just explain to him what you have shared in this article, and that it’s nothing to be afraid of. Thank you for writing this.

  13. Dusty says:

    When I was a kid I didn’t see spirits, but I could feel them.

    I remember going to bed one night and telling my Mum there was someone standing by the window staring at me. I didn’t see him. I didn’t feel anything physically. But mentally, I sensed it there, and it was a strong feeling, and even though I didn’t see anything, I could look at that spot and tell you how tall it was and how wide it was.

    It’s really difficult to explain.

  14. isa says:

    I saw one when I was six (between my bed and baby brother’s crib!) I ran to tell the parents and they said I was dreaming (um..no wide awake) never saw one since. I have seen colored orbs one an occasion as an adult..and heard single words here and there (very rarely) coming from nowhere. So..maybe I had sensitivity but obviously not really anymore. My son said his spirit in the room is faceless and we “have to help her put it back on” and “find her house”. She has a name “charlie” this is repeated too. He has not told tales either he’s a steadfast little boy:) I *do* know he is superbly empathetic when he sees others hurt/crying..stragers he runs up to to ask to ‘help’.so maybe empathic? This makes. Me think it is true. My mom also heard a child’s cry when she was on the phone talking to me (no idea if it was the spirit my son sees asking for validation it is truly real). I regularly call on Michael the archangel my son has his middle named to honor:) sadly the spirit it still around. Talking about angels standing guard did assuage his fears however..you are spot on there. My husband is inutitive and a good guy but I think fears the otgherside. He tells my son it isn’t real..period. I tried to explain how damaging that is and could further isolate our son’s fears. Now I handle the ‘seeing charlie’ talks. So far so good. It is frustrating not knowing when it will happen again b this is all sound advice..thanks!!

  15. isa says:

    Post script – our son told me he saw (name of friend of mine who died of suicide ten years ago) and described him to a t. Even the things he did in life (artist, told great jokes..son said he ‘made him laugh’) I casually pulled out a series of photos..group shots. People all strangers to him but friends of mine. He immediately picked the photo of my deceased friend and said “this is him!” Excitedly. He started sobbing when I took it away and said “he missed him”. I do not tell anyone because I am not even sure how he knew. I was careful to not look at the photos just laid them down and went about my business. So..maybe that one was a one off checking in? But at least it was not upsetting him. Still perplexes me and cannot make sense of it.

  16. suzanne says:

    my 6 year old grandaughter has talked about ghostleys in her room since 3 yrs. old. she will say: my ghostly friends…….my mother as well as her mother and i have always been psychic to an extent. now my 18 month old grandson is in the nursery and the older he gets, he points and cries at night to parts of the room. plus the room is cold. can you please give me an idea od things to do to make things better? we are catholic.will any blessed items such as rosaries, holy water,etc help? thank you

  17. Allison says:

    It is so refreshing to see such down to earth posts. I am a medium and have been seeing spirits for as long as I can remember. My mother, while intuitive, didn’t share my gift. I think she handled it very well as I was never afraid of what I saw. She even wrote down what I told her in a journal, and it is proving to be quite helpful since my niece (4yrs) is a medium as well. My experience has been that it is ok to engage spirits that seek you out, but to ignore those that are just hanging around. I view it like being at a party, you don’t have to talk to everyone there, just those that wave and engage you. I think its important to teach children this since they are often more sensitive than adults and can be bombarded by spirits. My mothers openess to my gift really let me explore it knowing she could help guide me. Thanks again for the great website!

  18. Heather says:

    Hello,
    I am glad that you wrote this but I am concerned. My 3 year old boy sees what he calls a scary pumpkin in my friends house, she claims to be a medium. I have personally heard things in the house as well but it is like he is drawn to it. I can’n seem to keep him away from it. He talks in such detail about where it is but not what it looks like. It is worring me and her. I was wondering if you had any advice on what I could do aside of not comming over.

  19. Michele says:

    Thank you for sharing some helpful tips in dealing with young children seeing spirits. My daughter started seeing them around 5 years old and she is very scared of them. she says they’re in her head and she cant get rid of them. They bother her and wont leave and they’re scary and mean. She stated that she hates her life! THat really scared me and she just said it again last week – she just turned 7 and is still very upset and doesnt want to talk about it. She begged me for a dream catcher which I bought online – looks like a real one to me but she wants to return it because it doesnt work!! I dont know what to do and i’m afraid the older she gets, the more she’ll “hate her life”. You know where I’m going with this…..I dont want to take her to the doctor or anything like that because they’ll most likely put her on medication even though, I beleive, it’s real and I dont want to medicate her – I dont feel like that’s a cure for this. I need some really good advice…HELP PLEASE!!

  20. adam says:

    Michelle,
    In my opinion you need to take her to a soul healer perhaps and get them to clear out any unwanted entities.I totally understand your daughter’s fears and I belive this will help.

  21. Paula says:

    Dear Michele,

    Thank you so much for your comment. I have a young daughter 61/2 years old and since having pneumonia, has started seeing people in her room at night – a very large, dark man with big feet who’s hands he put around her neck and squeezed so tight. Another, a young boy (bald) who unlike the man who she says felt like a ‘real person’, is there and she can make out his body but it’s ‘not like ours’. She’s terrified both day and night and spends the best part of her time when home, looking down the hallway, over her shoulders and always looks wide eyed with fear. I’m so lost and have tried many things to reassure her that it will all be OK – but I have a very open mind and believe that these things are possible. Just wish there was something I could do to better help her sleep peacefully at night.

  22. Kristi says:

    Hi, I am pretty freaked out right now..
    My 28 month old little girl has always been great to go to bed and last night I put her in and all of a sudden she Screamed out to me.. When I went in she kept saying “dont let the lady hurt me mommy”, I asked her what lady and she pointed to the corner of her room and just stared for about 5 mins. I took her out of her room gave her a bottle and went back to her room, when we entered her head went straight to the corner and she said “Hello”. I put her in bed and she stood up right away and started stareing in the corner again and telling me she is scared of the lady.. We did 3 or 4 times back and forth to the room and every time she looked at the corner and started to cry in a crazy way.. I have never had a experience like this with her and is wondering what I should do.. She is truly afraid and keeps looking at the same spot. I think she is too young to make up something like that.. Please Help me as I am very freaked out and is wondering if there truly is something in her room and if so How can I get rid of it.
    Also for months now she wakes up every night the same time 1:10 screaming for me.. When she is at her dads house she sleep through the night with no problems at all..

  23. Kelly says:

    My name is Kelly and I have a 13 year old daughter Madison. She’s able to see and feel spirits. It began only about three years ago, after her father passed away. She started seeing him after his passing. And she would see shadows it startled her but didn’t bother her. A few months back she started seeing a dark spirit in our home, but more important she felt his emotions, his anger and then saddness, and he stares at her and scares her. I’ve it is scaring her. Can you possible offer my daughter some advice or a book to read or something. We have a lot of faith in God and I’ve just been praying about it and praying for this spirit to have peace. But she really is having a hard time. I appreciate any advice or help. Thank you Kelly

  24. Tisha says:

    My daughter …now 8 yrs old…has seen spirits (which scared her) since she was about 3 yrs old. She has seen a lady with a bleeding leg and my daughter was terrified to go in my room for a month or so. Then she would say there was a little boy in her room playing in the water..this has been on and off for years…she then would hear them talking but couldn’t make out what they were saying…one night about 6 months ago…a voice spoke to her saying something about her dolly and then slapped the bottom of her foot. She woke me up out of a dead sleep telling me this. So..we now pray to the holy spirit for protection from these spirits. She now sees her Angels surrounding her bed at night from time to time..she gives a complete description of them (except for their faces..she can’t see them)..only to say they are white lighted and have long curly hair (she said, “Like my hair Mommy”). She says they stand with their arms out and their heads down. This is amazing.

  25. anonymous says:

    My husband seems to be sensitive with spirits as well as my oldest. He knew things about the land my parents built their house on that he coukdnt have known. But my oldest has always seen things. From the time she was about 18-24 months she cried about ” man with crazy eyes”. Now at 7 yrs old, she talks about Audra. A little girl spirit with long hair. And some sort of bad memory that literally makes her stop and scream (my daughter). Im glad that i was able to get some guidance on this.

  26. Jess says:

    My four year old daughter since the time she has been able to talk says that she talks to my grandparents on my mom side of the family at first i thought that it was just her playing games but then she started to describe them completely an knew their names an she has never seen a picture or heard their names before then she started speaking more often of my grandmother saying she does her hair an that she tells her to tell me an my mother things i do not want my daughter to lose the ability to do these things how would i help her to embrace this lovely gift that she has before it leaves her for good?

  27. nicole says:

    My son will be 3 in a couple months, I have noticed him stare at blank walls and point before, but I never paid too much attention to it until last night. I was laying in bed with him trying to get him to sleep, when he pointed at the ceiling and said “the father”. I wasn’t sure if I heard him correctly at first but then he kept repeating it. I have never spoken to him about God or death or anything, because he is too young to understand. But last night really made me wonder if something is going on that I haven’t been aware of. Any advice?

  28. Shane says:

    Love this site!!!

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