In this article, I’m going to talk about the patterns I’ve seen across thousands of past life and Akashic Record readings, as an intuitive, in terms of soul connections, soul contracts and relationships.

I just wanted to define the word ‘soul contract’ in case anyone reading is not familiar with this term, since this is something I cover in depth in this article:

According to Google, soul contracts are “pre-birth, spiritual agreements between souls to meet in a lifetime for mutual growth, learning, and karmic resolution.”

Do “soul mates” exist?

Yes, we do have soulmates, but I believe we have multiple soul mates — there is no one soul that we are linked to in every earthly lifetime.

Most of the souls I have read for have had between 50 and 150 past lives.

We tend to have had between 5 and 30 shared past lives with our significant romantic partner, for example our spouse. I’ve never read for anyone in a serious relationship who has had fewer than 5 or more than 30 past lives with their spouse or long-term partner.

So, if we are having romantic relationships in at least some of our earthly lifetimes as a soul, this means that there’s usually more than one soul we’ve repeatedly been in a romantic relationship with and love deeply on the soul level.

(This may not apply to souls with fewer than 30 earthly lifetimes under their belt — again, something I rarely see.)

We don’t jump in at the deep end

When we come across another soul who we decide to be in relationship with repeatedly, we tend to begin our association with that soul on the earth plane in a more casual way. I’ve seen it’s common to start out as an acquaintance, coworker or friend, and then progress to a romantic relationship after a few lifetimes.

Maybe we need those few or several lifetimes relating in other ways to know if this soul is someone who can help us evolve. Sort of like, testing compatibility before committing to deeper work together?

Or perhaps we create karma with that soul during those initial lifetimes that we decide to work out in a closer relationship.

Outdated soul contracts

There are two types of karma that we can incur and then balance (or work out) in romantic relationships.

• Justified karma
• Unjustified karma.

Here’s an example of justified karma in a relationship: in one lifetime, a daughter takes care of her ill mother for decades, choosing not to marry or have a family as a result. In the next lifetime, the roles are reversed and the mother from that life incarnates as a mother again who has a daughter with a disability or additional needs that require a lot of support.

This kind of justified karma is incurred and then balanced across the many lives of our soul.

There is another kind of karma, too, called unjustified karma that we can create and this can be tangled up in our relationships, and it is associated with hardship and struggle.

Unjustified karma is samskara (i.e. a karmic complex) involving another soul.

An example:

Maybe you are married to someone who betrays you in a traumatic way that causes your death. This trauma then becomes imprinted on your soul at the moment of death. Tibetan Buddhists believe that we carry over the contents of our subtle energies bodies (including our etheric body and its imprints) from one lifetime to the next. This is also something I believe to be true based on the past life readings I’ve done for people.

These imprints that result from trauma are like scratches on a record — they cause the same ‘song’ to repeat and get stuck. And when the past life trauma involved a specific soul, it can mean we are attracting the same soul into our earthly lives over and over to repeat the same painful story until we find resolution.

A karmic complex (aka unjustified karma) involving another person involves an outdated soul contract.

Soul contracts can be completely outdated or partially outdated.

Completely outdated soul contracts

Sometimes, it can be that our soul wants to let the other soul go completely so that we do not meet again in future lifetimes. This tends to be the case when the relationship in question is toxic or abusive. We have been repeating a terrible trauma over many lifetimes, often involving mistreatment or betrayal and all we want on the soul level is to just let this go (and let the soul go) and resolve the unjustified karma. This leaves us free to pursue other soul connections and experiences that are more positive.

Partially outdated soul contracts

But other times, the soul contract between two souls could just be partly outdated, meaning that there is a negative dynamic between two souls that is repeating across many lives, that needs releasing so that the two souls can improve their dynamic in some way, and make it a healthier relationship.

I have read for many clients who are happily married but have a karmic complex that involves their spouse, and it usually means there is just one part of their soul contract that is outdated and needs a change, so that they can create a new story together in that area. So, for example it could be that these two souls help each other to evolve in a positive way and love each other, but they also have a long running story around making bad financial decisions together. That is a story that can be changed. Just one possible example of a partially outdated soul contract – the relationship is mostly positive (or has the potential to be) but there’s this one past life trauma that keeps tripping the two people up, lifetime after lifetime.

But the soul contracts involving exes — especially when the relationship was an unhappy one — are oftentimes completely outdated.

How do you know if your soul contract with someone is completely outdated?

• You’ve tried everything but you can’t fix the toxicity in the relationship
• The other person is harming the relationship but will not change
• Staying in the relationship makes you ill, physically or mentally
• The bad outweighs the good, by far.

By the way, there is a clear way to know if karma is justified or unjustified.

Unjustified karma is characterised by sameness — a repeated negative pattern across this life or across many lifetimes, indicates the presence of a karmic complex/unjustified karma.

On the contrary, justified karma is characterised by opposites — i.e. you took care of me in one life, I take care of you in another. (It’s not in a punishing ‘eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth’ sense. It’s more about wholeness and reciprocation, i.e. you taught me this, and I taught you that.)

Compatibility with life lessons

One of the things I’ve often seen for spouses and romantic partners is that we tend to have compatibility with our life lessons.

What does that mean?

First of all, I just wanted to explain the concept of ‘life lessons’:

A huge reason for souls incarnating on Earth is for the learning opportunities offered here.

And before we even incarnate here, we decide on a curriculum of ‘life lessons’ that we are going to learn. I call these ‘life lessons’ but in fact they are more like energetic qualities or themes that we explore in any given lifetime. They are like the underlying ‘thread’ of our life experiences – and we usually attract people, situations and experiences which help us to explore these themes and lessons.

Why do we bother to learn life lessons? Well, the keyword is ‘wholeness’. On the soul level, we always have strengths but there are also energetic qualities that we lack in ourselves.

And the purpose of life lessons is to give us experiences that change us slightly on the soul level, so that we can integrate those energetic qualities into our soul, and reach a greater sense of wholeness on the soul level.

Some examples of common life lessons are self-love, trust, power and success (there are 88 life lessons that I know of). And it tends to take between 5 and 15 lifetimes to thoroughly explore a life lesson.

(As an aside, if you’re interested in finding out your curriculum of life lessons for this lifetime, check out my Akashic Record reading.)

Something I have noticed is that spouses and romantic partners are sometimes learning the same life lesson. For example, one partner may be learning the life lesson of ‘success’ as their primary life lesson and the other partner may have the same life lesson as their most prominent secondary life lesson. This is a real example from my client work, and the couple in question had the same life goal of creating success together, on their own terms and had been involved in multiple joint ventures as a team of two. I’ve seen this a lot – two souls who are having the same experiences together for a reason!

Other times, one of the partners will have mastered a life lesson that the other partner is currently learning. For example, one partner has explored the life lesson of self-love, along with other heart chakra focused life lessons (such as kindness, self-worth, receiving, respect, belonging or healing) and the other is currently exploring a life lesson of self-love and has not explored any of those heart chakra lessons. It’s likely that the partner who has integrated those heart centred energetic qualities into their soul is able to support the other partner with their life lesson of self-love, often without even knowing that they are doing so. It could be in the form of modelling good self-care, providing encouragement and moral support or reminding their partner when they are being too hard on themselves.

Here are the takeaways from this article on romance and past lives:

• There is no one soul mate that we are linked to across every lifetime — we tend to have multiple soul mates
• Most souls have between 5 and 30 shared lifetimes with their partner or spouse
• Often when couples struggle with something in particular, it’s because they have a partially outdated soul contract that needs releasing so they can create a new, more positive story together
• Very toxic and/or abusive relationships that are impervious to change will involve a completely outdated soul contract, where the soul desires to walk away from the connection but cannot, due to unresolved unjustified karma that causes the same story to repeat, like a groove in a record
• There is often synergy/compatibility in terms of what the souls are learning in this life.

By the way — there is a way to resolve unjustified karma and I talk about that in this article.

This week, I am making a special offer that may not be made again in the future!

Relationship readings for couples

Past life email reading – $150 – SOLD OUT

In this reading, I will tell you how many shared past lives you have had, what those relationships were (i.e. ‘you’ve been friends 3 times, partners 3 times and family members 4 times’ sort of thing!)

I’ll also tell you about one shared past life – I’ll ask Spirit for the most relevant or interesting past life between you two (this description of the shared past life will probably be half a page – one page long.)

This past life reading is only for people who are in a relationship — it’s not suitable if you want to be in a relationship with someone or you might be interested in dating someone. It’s for relationships that are significant enough to get off the ground (that way I can guarantee there will be something of substance to tell you about!)

Full Relationship reading – $499 – SOLD OUT

In this reading I will provide three readings – one for you and one for your partner, and one on the relationship.

Each reading will be a mini Akashic Record reading for you both, describing your most important gifts and traits.

It will also contain information on your primary and most prominent secondary life lesson for this lifetime, along with your partner’s primary and secondary life lesson.

Both you and your partner will receive this information, in the form of two email readings (one each.)

Then I will do a third reading where I tell you if there is anything that stands out for me looking at your individual readings in terms of compatibility, strengths and how you fit together as a couple.

I will also tell you how many shared past lives you have had, what those relationships were (i.e. ‘you’ve been friends 3 times, partners 3 times and family members 4 times’ sort of thing!)

I’ll also tell you about one shared past life. I’ll ask Spirit for the most relevant or interesting past life. This will probably be half a page to one page long.

Altogether the info for the full relationship readings will be 17-20 pages +

Comes with the opportunity to ask follow up questions for up to one week.

(I do not recommend having the full relationship reading if you or your partner have already had a mini reading with me or a full Akashic reading, since we’ll go over the same info, so you’ll be hiring me to research info that you’ve already had.)

The wait time for this reading is 7 weeks.

You can sign up for this full reading here.

Please note, for both of these readings I will need personal information from you (a recent photo of both parties, names, DOB and place of birth.) This information is used to access your Akashic soul record. I will email you to request this information within 24 hours of receiving your booking.

(This offer is limited to 7 of each reading so if you’re interested I recommend not hanging around as my readings get booked up quickly!)