Feel Free to Spit It Out

One of the lessons I’ve learned since I began studying several years ago with spiritual teachers, healers and intuitives is this:

To take what I need and like, and to discard everything else

(I am referring to spiritual teachings and other peoples’ opinions and guidance that comes in readings.)

Many years ago, in a reading I had from an angel intuitive I used to work with in London, I was told:

“Spirit says you’re taking on too many ideas that don’t resonate with you. You’re eating up whole ideas without spitting something out.”

It was true. The reason it was true for me was probably because I was taught growing up:

“If you are going to live under this roof, you have to agree with me.”

This dysfunctional dynamic continued for me in the area of learning and teaching. I often felt that it was not polite to disagree with a spiritual teacher. But in practice it is extremely rare to truly resonate with everything that comes out of a teacher’s mouth.

Accepting whole ideas without doing your own “sifting”, because you feel you have to (or because everyone else is) is bad for your personal power and solar plexus chakra. It is bad for your personal power because it means you are not consciously choosing what works for you, and then taking responsibility for those ideas or teachings.

If a spiritual teacher is offended or threatened by you not taking on board their ideas, teachings or methods, lock, stock and barrel, before you have tested them, then they have a fragile ego or insecurity issues.

For some people this lesson may seem obvious and common sense. Because this is related to one of my life lessons (inner authority and personal power), I had to learn this several times over. I once had a teacher refuse to work with me and turn against me because I added something to and adapted the healing system she taught me. This is just one example.

When I learned this lesson, or at least became more aware of it, I decided to introduce a waiver that all clients sign before they work with me and it says the following:

“I accept that, in undertaking a session of spiritual healing or an intuitive reading, I am responsible for the consequences. It is my responsibility to decide what is right for me and to take from them what is useful for my personal and spiritual development.”

I believe that it makes you healthy and mature to be willing to question, experiment and ultimately reject ideas and teachings (or just one part of an idea or teaching), even if you esteem the teacher.

Feel free to spit it out.

Meet Anna

Hi, I’m Anna Sayce! My purpose here on this website is to provide practical techniques and information to help empaths to understand, and fix the root of their energetic overwhelm & also to help sensitives to embrace and develop their intuitive gifts. I believe that developing our spiritual & intuitive side is very powerful and allows us to improve our own lives, and if we wish, even make the world a better place for others. Discover more >


  1. Rosine Caplot

    Oh, I can relate! This was a big lesson for me too.

    There was this one intuitive I told that I was trying to cut certain foods out of my diet because they weren’t doing me good.

    She said it was me wanting to be God knows how “pure” before I deserved abundance. She said “Why can’t you just eat a bit of everything like any other normal person? This might even be what’s keeping you stuck in scarcity!”.

    Her words really bothered me after the session. I didn’t feel like I wanted to be “pure” at all, just that I really needed to improve my diet. I wrote her an email explaining that from my perspective, it is a matter of elementary self-love that if I feel some foods don’t do me good, I’d stop eating them.

    She was gracious about it and answered she would always advise me to go with my own inner wisdom.

    But I didn’t. Somehow her words kept resonating in my head. I thought “Well, she’s so highly psychic, and she channeled it from my guides, so she must be right, mustn’t she? She must know better.” And I got doubts about my motivations, thinking “Maybe I have this wanting to be “pure” but it’s subconscious or something?”.

    So I did what she had advised and ate “a bit of everything like any other normal person”. It was NOT a good idea. My health totally went downhill, and everything else in my life too, including my relationships and my finances.

    It took me a long time to realize that maybe she didn’t have it right on this one and that I should have listened to my own inner wisdom.

    Ironically, some time later she took a food intolerance test and cut some foods out of her diet, saying there was no way she’d eat foods that don’t do her good. I was really pissed when I saw that, not so much at her, but at myself for trusting her judgment more than my own. :p

  2. Ayla

    I appreciate this post so very much. A sage relative and I often used to get into heated discussions about religion. I was raised in a certain faith, and apparently, in his wisdom,he saw the fallacy in it. The best advice he ever gave me was, “Don’t accept anything without questioning it.” In my ignorance, I thought it would be blasphemous to question things that didn’t quite fit together or make sense well.

    However, one positive thing I can attribute to getting older is the wisdom I have gained in the process. A life event inadvertently led to many different quests for knowledge, the big one being spirituality. I realized after much gathering of information available, that not only did religion have hardly anything if at all to do with true spirituality, but also that even in spiritual quests, things sometimes seemed off or very unnatural to me. Part of that was the need to step out of my comfort zone of a wrong, oppressive belief system, but it had to do with what, as you said, resonated within me as well. I have to admit, some of the teachings I’ve learned still seem hokey after trying them, and others intuitively feel right on.

    We may all be one energy when it’s all said and done, but we have been created as individuals. Truly, what works for one may not work for another. I feel that our sincerity, our intent to connect with the Great Spirit in a way that results in that true connection and results in love and the light within is far more important than certain steps or rituals that feel unnatural and take away from the focus and intent of that connection.

    I recently discovered your site and I have enjoyed so much everything you’ve offered so far. Thank you for this post and so much more. Blessings to you!

  3. Amanda

    Love this post, Anna! Just out of curiosity, do you offer “life lesson” readings, in which someone can find out what their lessons are for this lifetime?


  4. Simone

    I just recently started following this site and I’m really glad that I found it.
    This was a great article and I really agree with it’s content.
    Thanks for validating what I’ve been thinking!

  5. Vanessa

    What you’ve written about filtering info is so very wise, and I can imagine that it might have been a shock when your teacher decided to cut ties because you’d adapted what she’d taught you.

    The reminder about digestion issues being related to trying to take on board ideas that do not serve us well is very timely for me! I thank you, as does my tummy( ;

  6. Brandi

    Brilliant!! I was just reflecting on this! lol I was revved up after a conversation where the person kept parroting self-help dogma to me. I was relating a meaningful, personal growth experience to her- new travels and subsequent realizations, insights- but she kept interrupting with meaningless spiritual mantras similar to “All is one” and “Everything is as it should be”. She was so uncomfortable with the ambiguity of my preferences, i.e. doing what’s right me on my terms, that she ran away from a conversation that didn’t hinge on cookie-cutter beliefs. She had no opinion, no personal revelation, no ponderings, no shift in worldview, no contrarian perceptions. Nothing! Just one-liner mantras.

    It was clear she’d become addicted to spiritual gurus, “ascended” channeled entities, and self-help teachings devoid of her own personal revelation and integration.

    I understand and can relate to the bliss one feels when connected to spiritual truth. Yet I always say that only our heart knows its own fulfillment. A spiritual Truth is only the stage. We select and set the scene and enliven the story as we create it. Life is teeming with variety. Why in the world would the “All” limit itself to one preference?? It wouldn’t! There are billions of life-affirming preferences to make. We need not choose just a few.

    Yet it is tempting to rely on external sources for guidance in a hierarchical society that regards the opinions of “authorities” above our own. And I know that spiritual guidance can seem superior to other forms of knowing and can give one a sense of control and comfort in this constantly changing world.

    I even noticed a tendency in myself to give up my power to intuitives. “Just tell me what to do, what to think, what to feel and believe so I can be make sense of my life and feel secure” was my attitude. I just wanted to get on with feeling good. I didn’t want the process. I was terrified of it. I rejected the discomfort, the insecurity, disorientation, confusion, chaos, total meltdown, uncertainty etc. that often begets deep personal revelation. I even rejected the pleasant feelings of inspiration, clarity, knowing, excitement, passion, desire and relief that also begets deep personal revelation because I was afraid of where it would take me. I was afraid I’d get it wrong. I wanted someone “better equipped” to guide me along the “right” path.

    So I get it. But nothing fulfills like honoring what works for me, and I champion my right to prefer.

  7. Laura

    “…For some people this lesson may seem obvious and common sense. Because this is related to one of my life lessons (inner authority and personal power), I had to learn this several times over. I once had a teacher refuse to work with me and turn against me because I added something to and adapted the healing system she taught me. This is just one example.”–

    Sometimes we just need to be reminded we do have our own free will. Thank you, thank you, & thank you! This made MY day. I read the whole thing, but I stopped at that particular paragraph. I’m just glad to reread something I’m just confirming that I knew deep inside myself. I think many people can relate too.

  8. Jennifer Flint ~ The Aura Reader

    I’m definitely with you on this one – I’ve always been the type to pick and choose the things that resonate with me from any given philosophy or piece of advice. I’ve always heard that the right religious text, etc. is like a mirror: you can see yourself reflected in it. I think that’s a good way of thinking about it.

    And even as an intuitive myself, I never ask or expect anyone to substitute my judgment for their own, and in fact encourage them not to. Everyone really is responsible for their own decisions, and should empower themselves to make them and live by them.

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